Gilbert Arenas Claims He Earned the Worst Contract of All Time

Bog - Gilbert Arenas was recently asked by TMZ whether his contract was the worst in NBA history. His response surely has Wizards executives choking on their Frosted Mini-Wheats.

“What I did to get the contract was different than what I’ve done since I got the contract,” Arenas said, accurately. “I got hurt before I got the contract and I still got rewarded. So it’s not like I tricked somebody. They knew I was hurt. I didn’t play that year; I played like [13] games the year before my contract and I got the contract anyway, because of what I DID. You get paid on what you did, not what you’re GONNA do. That’s what people don’t understand. You get paid on what you did.”

Would it be so crazy that Gilbert Arenas isn’t the fucking idiot everyone thinks he is? What’s fair is fair – Gilbert did work his fucking ass off to go from being passed over in the ’01 draft in favor of studs like Trenton Hassell, Joseph Forte, and Kirk Haston to legitimately being one of the top players in the league. The sad thing about Arenas’s career is that all everyone is going to remember is bringing guns into the locker room and signing the worst contract in NBA history.

Gilbert’s fucking right though, it’s not his fault Washington gave him a max deal with a shitty knee. But, when it comes down to it, who really gives a fuck if the Wizards paid him too much? The salary’s off the books and nobody goes to the games, so if ticket prices went up, who the fuck would notice? And, honestly, who would you rather have the cash? A guy who entertained the shit out of us for 3+ years or fucking Zach Leonsis so he can impress the money grubbing whores at George by how much he stands to inherit?  

 

Sure Agent Zero’s mentality is exactly why you should never pay someone who overperforms in a contract year, but those years Gilbert dominated were (sadly) the Wizards’ highlight of the past quarter century. If Arenas is still dropping 30 a game when he lays that iron out in front of Javaris Crittenden, do the Wizards even make a big deal about it? Fuck no. Sure he took a dump in Andray Blatche’s shoe, but who the fuck doesn’t want to do that right now? Will he eventually go broke? Most fucking definitely. Remember Gilbert however you want, but the truth is Agent Zero was RG3 before there was an RG3.

Morgan Freeman and Robert DeNiro Prepare to Lose All Dignity as "Last Vegas" Release Date Approaches

If there’s one thing that Hollywood has shown us over the past couple years, it’s that America loves seeing old people act like sex crazed teenagers. What better way to capitalize on this trend than exploiting some of the greatest actors of all time in a Las Vegas boozed up sex romp? I can understand Michael Douglas signing up for this piece of shit, because, let’s be honest, what has he done recently besides getting Cancerlingus? But Morgan Freeman and Robert DeNiro? Are they just so starved to stay in the public eye that they’ll do whatever piece of shit script lands on their agents’ desks?

Shockingly, there are no reviews out there for this movie. That’s likely because the studio realizes every critic is just waiting to shit all over it, so they probably aren’t screening it to anyone, but here’s a prediction of what goes down:

Old men break away from collecting fucking stamps to go to Vegas, all primed to see the Rat Pack perform or some shit, but what’s that? The Rat Pack is dead? My, Vegas sure has changed! So many bright lights! So many fake tits!  Rap music? What’s rap music?? I'm only familiar with Vaudeville! But then they get drunk and finally start to fit in. For whatever reason, probably because she’s a hooker, some young smoke decides to bang one of them, which of course leads to countless Viagra jokes. After several more jokes about heart attacks and social security checks, they eventually realize that even though they’ve been accepted by the city, they are in fact old as shit. Cue some shitty outtakes reel in the credits.

You know how your Grandparents never want you to see them dying in the hospital because they’re scared that’s how you’ll always remember them? Yeah, that’s happening with Morgan Freeman and Robert DeNiro’s film career right now, but clearly they don’t give a shit who sees it. 

Broncos to Pay Homage to Shanahan Before Sunday's Game

Source - Another week, another tribute.

Now it's Mike Shanahan's turn to be honored by his former NFL team.
Denver's coach from 1995-2008, Shanahan has the same role with the Washington Redskins. Shanahan's Redskins play the Broncos on Sunday at Sports Authority Field at Mile High.

The Broncos want to make sure people know they will forever appreciate Shanahan's contributions to the Denver franchise. As the Redskins are introduced as a team for the starting lineups, the Broncos will show a 20-second highlight film of Shanahan's head coaching career in Denver.

There’s seriously more dick sucking going on in the NFL these days than at a truck stop glory hole. What’s the deal with these weekly homages to guys who were unceremoniously booted out of town? Don’t the Broncos remember that Shanahan got fired? Sure he won two rings, but everyone knows he couldn’t win shit without Elway. I hate Philly fans more than anything, but at least they treat players who skipped town like fucking garbage. The only welcome home to the Linc for TO was a sock full of batteries. Isn’t that what Sports are all about? If you’re not with us, you’re fucking against us.

It’s even worse in the MLB. Why the fuck are teams throwing retirement parties for Hall of Famers that spent years dominating them? Oh hey, Mariano Rivera, sure you made us your bitch for the past 15 years, but let’s just bury the hatchet with this sand sculpture of your face!

Twenty or thirty years ago, opposing players used to straight up hate each other. Now, when KG and Paul Pierce give Ray Allen shit for jumping to their biggest rival, it’s the top story on PTI for three weeks. Honestly, I realize all these fluff pieces for returning players/coaches are about sportsmanship, but who really gives a fuck about that. Fans aren’t paying $100/ticket to see players act like good sports. We want blood. Save your sportsmanship for the fucking T-Ball Field.

Clarendon Women Force Man to Masturbate in Public

 

 

 

 

INDECENT EXPOSURE, 10/10/13, 2700 block of N. Clarendon Boulevard. On October 10 at 7:07pm, a victim reported a suspect masturbating outside of a hair salon. The suspect is described as a white male, between 45 and 55 years of age, approximately 5’7” and about 150 pounds. The suspect had shoulder length brown hair, but was bald on the top of his head. At the time of the incident, he was wearing blue jeans, brown boots, a black belt, and a green jacket.

 

So, shoulder length hair, but bald on the top of his head, huh? How am I not surprised that he was caught yanking his chain in public? But Clarendon? Bold move. For those of you that don’t know, Clarendon is the richest part of Arlington, where somehow they’ve been able to get rid of all the homeless people, so us rich White kids don’t have to be reminded that there’s more to the World than being rich and White. Unfortunately, sometimes fucking outsiders get in. Honestly I’m surprised there’s not some form of Brocial Profiling going on in Clarendon where if you’re not wearing a pastel Polo/Brooks Brothers shirt and brown flip flops you’re sent back over the border to South Arlington aka Mex-ington where you fucking  belong.

Since I’m obviously Rich and White and Tall, unlike this fucking 5’7’’ tadpole, I have no fucking clue what’s going through this guy’s mind, but I can only imagine he’s looking for a thrill? You know, the whole “staring at girls on the Metro then running to the nearest bush” wasn’t doing it for him anymore? Maybe he’s got some sort of sick hair fetish, but if that’s the case, wouldn’t he be caught sifting through the salon dumpster? Don’t get me wrong there are plenty of hot chicks roaming Clarendon Boulevard, but get some fucking tact, bro. If you’re gonna jerk it to some girl getting her hair done, at least cut your fucking rape-locks.



Former Hoya/Current Pirate Victor Page In Prison for 10 Years (Not Pictured: John Thompson)

Washington Times - Last month, a Prince George’s County Circuit Court judge sentenced Page to 10 years in jail after he pleaded guilty to second-degree assault. Page had been out of jail less than a month on unrelated charges when three Prince George’s County Sheriff’s deputies were summoned to a Forestville apartment at 1:03 a.m. on Feb. 8.

“The suspect jumped out of bed, pulled the victim’s hair tearing it from the scalp,” the statement of probable cause read. “He then dragged her to the bathroom, throwing her into the tub and running hot water on her while punching the victim repeatedly in the face.”

The statement continued: “The suspect then ran into the kitchen and grabbed a knife and stabbed the victim on her right hand and right thigh. The victim then ran outside as the suspect chased her with the knife and stated he was going to kill her.”

But trouble of every variety has been Page’s companion since he starred at McKinley Tech High School, from the laundry list of charges covering everything from cocaine to theft to the unlawful use of a livestock vehicle to the gunshot two days before Thanksgiving in 2003 that took his right eye.

Over the last three and a half years, Page has been charged with 33 crimes in Maryland and the District. He’s been found guilty of (or pleaded guilty to) six of them, including two second-degree assaults, a fourth-degree sexual offense, unlawful entry, fourth-degree burglary and possession of marijuana.

Georgetown fans might remember Victor Page from back in the Iverson days as the high scoring guard who was a bigger gunner than Aaron Hernandez on PCP. Well, much like AI, looks like life in his late 30’s are not treating Victor all that well.  After leaving Georgetown early only to be undrafted and spending years in the CBA, he’s decided to pursue other ventures, you know, normal post basketball moves, like losing a fucking eye in a Thanksgiving gun fight. While Iverson has testified in his child support hearings that he’s so broke that he doesn’t even have enough money to buy a fucking cheeseburger, and Victor is swabbing the prison decks like fucking Blackbeard’s Cabin Boy, where the fuck is John Thompson?

Back in the mid-90’s after the Georgetown program had struggled to make Final Four runs even with Who Wants to Sex Mutombo and Alonzo Mourning, so Thompson decided to follow Bob Huggins’ lead at Cincinnati and brought in troubled kids with incredible talent, but after spending 2 years at Hilltop, they fucking bolted to the League. Now I know Big John and AI continued to have a relationship, of course he would - he’s one of the greatest players in the past 25 years. If Big John loves all his kids the same, where the fuck was he when Victor Page was sleeping on the street? Could it be that the whole Father/Mentor thing he preached was just a bunch of bullshit to, oh I don’t know, win fucking basketball games? Now I know that John Thompson has done a lot of good, and I’m sure along the way he’s tried to help Victor Page, but seriously, how the fuck can you turn your back on one of your players like this? What kind of Coach/Mentor has two of his kids end up like Iverson and Victor Page? Both flat out broke, one in prison and the other likely headed that way. Honestly, both these guys will be lucky to be alive in 10 years and who will likely be front and center talking about how he did everything he did to help them? John Fucking Thompson.